A Letter to a Military Child from Author Dan Gemeinhart

July 1, 2015

I was little when my dad left with his Army unit to spend a year in Korea. Really little – about five years old. I was way too young to understand what it all meant. I didn’t know where Korea was or why moms and dads had to go there. I didn’t know anything about war or duty or service. I just knew that my daddy was going to be gone far away, for a long time, and that I didn’t want him to be. I knew that him being gone made my mom tired, my sister sad, and my house seem empty and quiet. Like a song being played with the volume turned down – and one of the instruments missing.

It’s hard to have a piece of your family missing. In a lot of ways, it feels like having a piece of yourself missing. I think you might know what that feels like, too.

I felt that same way every time we moved, which we did a lot. It’s also tough to leave your house and your school and your friends behind and to start off from scratch somewhere new. It’s tough to be the new kid, to walk into a classroom full of strangers and know that none of them are the friends you left behind at your old school. That can feel like having a piece of yourself missing, too.

When you keep feeling like there’s a piece of yourself missing, it makes you hold on tighter to the pieces you have left. And for me, stories and books and reading were something that I grabbed onto and held tight.

Because stories are magical. They are places you can go without leaving the room. They are worlds you can explore from your bed or your couch – even if your bed and your couch are in a new house. I loved the excitement of discovering a new story – but I also loved the warm feeling of enjoying a favorite one again. Stories, I learned, could be a home. A home I could count on. A home that I could always come back to, no matter where I was.

Stories also connect people. They can hold us together and keep us close, even if we’re miles or worlds apart. Sharing stories is more than just sharing words – it’s sharing feelings, and memories, and laughter, and tears. It’s sharing life, really. And it’s magical.

That’s why I’m so in love with United Through Reading. I love what it stands for, and what it does. Helping military families stay connected through shared stories is such a wonderful, important thing…it’s everything I would have wished for as a kid, when my dad was off in Korea.

My book, The Honest Truth, is a made-up story, but I know that my experiences growing up in a military family influenced it. It’s about a boy who leaves his home. It’s about a boy fighting to hold onto the pieces of himself. It’s about a boy trying to stay connected to his friends and the people he loves. It’s about tough stuff, and hard decisions, and climbing mountains. It’s about a boy and a dog – but really it’s about figuring out who you are and where you belong in this world. Which is really what growing up is all about – especially if you’re growing up in a military family, where homes can come and go, and moms and dads can come and go, too.

I learned a lot of lessons, growing up in a military family.
Saying good-bye to friends is the worst; but I learned that no matter where you go, there are always new friends to be made.

Leaving home behind is the worst; but I learned home is not a house, or even a place. It’s the people you’re with, and the memories you carry with you.

Being apart from your mom or dad is the worst; but I learned that even when someone you love is far away, it doesn’t mean that you still aren’t close together, in a lot of ways. You’re still a part of each other’s story, and stories matter.

I don’t know what the story of your life is like. I don’t know if your mom or dad is deployed, or to where, or for how long. But I do know that it might be a tough story sometimes. Because every good story has hard parts, dark chapters where the characters don’t know how they’re gonna make it; but those are the parts that make the heroes strong.  And you are, believe it or not, the hero of your own story. You are. Even when you feel small, or sad, or alone, you are the hero. Maybe even especially during those times. And you’re getting stronger all the time.

I know you’ve got a story to tell, and I know that it’s a good one. Because stories with some tough stuff in them are usually the best kind of stories.

And that’s the honest truth.

Dan G
Learn more about our friend Dan Gemeinhart and his new book, The Honest Truth, at dangemeinhart.com.  

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